fbpx          
Communication Insights and Getting Grounded in A World of Chaos

Communication Insights and Getting Grounded in A World of Chaos

Article by Kirsten Macdonald with contribution from Des Carter. 

Communicating with others can sometimes feel like a minefield. 

There are so many messages, perceptions and neurons firing that what should be simple can be anything but! After an overwhelming response to our article Secret Messages, What You See Isn’t Always What You Get, we decided to dig a bit more. 

 

We asked Des Carter; Kinesiologist, Linguistics practitioner, Holistic Human Development Therapist and Meditation Teacher about his insight into communication. 

Communication is a two-way process of sending and receiving messages and is effective when each person understands each other, however this two-way process can easily break down. 

Have you observed the people who only want others to listen to them, but do these people also understand that they need to listen to other people as well? With the principle of listening also comes the ability to effectively understand the things around us. 

Clear communication can be blocked when misunderstandings arise due to:

  • Different emotional states
  • Difference in personal values
  • Incongruence between verbal and non-verbal communication
  • Difference in the ways people interpret messages

If we listen to what we say and what we think, we would actually understand whether we’re making any sense or not. Clarity is not all about the way you manage the outside world, the answer is to go within yourself and manage your inner being that will enable you to identify the lack of clarity that needs to be identified. 

Remember: whatever requires clarity needs to be understood and if we don’t understand something, we need to take time to ask questions and listen to others.

 

To maintain attention in communication and situations, the “Grounding Technique” is a great way to calm the chatter of your mind. It also improves co-ordination and increases mental clarity and alertness.

 

Here’s how to do it:

 

Bend your knees a little and position your tongue on the roof of your mouth behind your top teeth, shrug your shoulders and shake your arms for a few moments to free up any tension.

 

Now focus on your feet and imagine them sinking down into the ground that supports them, imagine them feeling rooted deep into the earth.

 

Place the fingertips of your left hand beneath your lower lip in the centre of your chin and place the heel of your right hand over your navel with the fingertips of that hand pointing down towards the ground, breathe deeply and gradually slow your breathing down.

 

If you want to, you can imagine the colour red at the base of your spine, deep earthy red. Stay like this and hold your hands on these energy points for the next few moments.

 

Now push your feet down into the floor and switch hands, breathe deeply and allow yourself to let any tension go from your neck and shoulders. Remain like this for a few moments.

 

Then push your feet down into the floor and switch hands, focus on your feet and imagine them deeply rooted to the earth and remain again for a few moments, breathing deeply and steadily down into your stomach.

 

Grounding techniques such as this can be a really positive practise in your day to day life. Enjoy! 

 

A bit more about Des:

Des is an experienced Trainer, Kinesiologist, Reiki Practitioner, NLP Practitioner, Holistic Human Development Therapist and Meditation Teacher, who works in private practice. His passion is assisting people to develop their self-confidence and self-esteem enabling them to address any personal issues in their lives. In his previous occupation as a Senior Category Buyer with the Coles Myer Group he travelled extensively to India, China, Japan, South America, Europe and the USA where he experienced and observed a range of different cultures and traditions.

 

For more information go to https://descarter.com.au/about-des-carter/ 

JAX Tyres for Ponderings

Related Articles

Related

Follow Us

Join

Subscribe For Updates & Offers

Support our mission to write and produce Positive Stortelling, it takes a tribe to build one. 

Dear Grownups

Dear Grownups

Words by Kirsten Macdonald

You are the humanity in which I am supposed to learn my way; to teach me your wisdom. 

 

You have walked the path, burned the forests, surely you have the knowledge, you have discovered a way forward you might teach me or might help reduce my pain and heal my trauma? 

 

For the trauma is supposed to be a lesson, not a prison. For the victim to become the warrior, will you hold the space with me? Teach me? Please don’t outsource your love and transcendence. I have waited so long. 

 

“All grown-ups were once children… but only few of them remember it.” 

― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

 

Don’t you want to heal your heart while you help me heal mine?

 

By the time I find these words, these big sounds you have taught me and I form them in ways to ask of you these things you have left. Your eyes glaze over, you have no time. This thing called time creates a gap in the footpath I cannot jump over. This crack cannot be avoided, it is a fault line that isn’t yours. 

 

You are doing the best you can. 

 

The only thing is I thought you had more. I was born with a promise you had more. More time, more love and calm. More peace and patience. I want. Why was I born with this promise inside me? This expectation? It feels unkind, an empty box on a day of gifts. 

 

The guilt unfurls like ripped ribbon and I am starting to understand now. 

 

This is the way of things. I shall snap these twigs between my thighs and start a fire, because you have taught me well and these things shall pass. 

 

We shall stamp our feet on the earth, watch the dust fly up, saltwater, tear the leaves, sing into the wonder of night and laugh in the rebirth of the morning. I shall love you, bathe your feet and know you as best I can. For the box was never empty, it was never a box at all, it was a message that said I am so tired my child. 

“Grown-ups never understand anything by themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always and forever explaining things to them” 

Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

Written by Kirsten Macdonald

Narnia, A Faraway Tree with a smidge of a Doc called Suess, and some Kahlil Gibran is the word charm that grew seeds in Kirsten Macdonald's imagination. She has an innate curiosity about the stories of "us" and a deep faith that is strongly supported by a dark sense of humour. Ask this wordsmith about anthropology, ancient religions, the curious nature of humanity and the incredible cuteness of sloths and you will have a conversation for hours. Writer, editor and researcher, Kirsten has developed Ponderings into a space that is now shared by a team and a shared vision that is infectiously positive and forged in good stuff.

Related Articles

Related

Follow Us

Join

Subscribe For Updates & Offers

Support our mission to write and produce Positive Stortelling, it takes a tribe to build one. 

The Tangible Oscillation of Us

The Tangible Oscillation of Us

Words by Kirsten Macdonald

 

This earth spins, and its inhabitants live in a systemised structure designed to keep us animated. 

 

To keep the axis infused with purpose. Functionalized pecking order is not reserved for the human species either; most species have hierarchical structures. From Zebrafish to Lemurs, many of earth’s inhabitants distribute resources by way of categorising classes. Birds and fish do not let their own starve, but then wolves will eat their young… there’s that. 

 

It’s the social stratification stuff that gets interesting. Samurai to Servant, Bourgeoisie to Butler, Brahmins to Shudras, we could go on for days. Words like Third World, lower socio-economic, middle class, uneducated, academic, wealth, poverty, powerful words all based around how products, food and energy is distributed. 

Civilisation has us transformed from tribes to towns and towns to towers. 

To feed the world, we are told we must control the soil, grow more, make the seeds more robust, use science to control the soil, so it absorbs the moisture, kills the bugs and then we kill the nutrients. So then we buy the supplements we need because the food does not give it to us. We try to stop starvation, and we swallow disease for the privilege. There are even classes and equipment we can pay to do the exercise we would have done collecting water and making bricks or our growing food. A little ironic and chaotic don’t’ you think?

But the uncanny thing is we can change the pattern, and we have everything at our fingertips. 

Physics tells us we can. Let’s make a quantum leap here. 

Life is a label we give to animated cells. 

 

Do we store our wisdom, our ancestral memory in our brain, our DNA, or in our ether or is it a binary system, a code written well before primordial sludge could swipe an EFTPOS card? Can existential lessons create a version of social inertial force? Imagine if we imbued these structures with a new form?

 

Have you ever heard of the theory of Spontaneous Self-Organisation? Universal and very complex phenomena are taking place in the physical, chemical and biological world, and it is science’s way of understanding unexplainable order in the chaos. 

 

Everything vibrates or moves; even inanimate objects are made of tiny particles. Here is where it gets interesting; when different vibrating forms are near each other; they will often start to vibrate together and get in sync with each other. Welcome to Spontaneous Self-Organisation.  

 

An example is the patterned swimming of schools of fish, without any outside direction. 

 

When many fireflies get together, their light will begin to pulsate at the same rate. Crystallisation and snowflake patterns are another. There are so many. Scientists are now working out how DNA does this, along with stem cells along with neuroplasticity. It’s exciting, and it is complicated. 

 

Magnets are an excellent example of SSO. 

 

Iron is a magnetic material and is made up of tiny magnets called ‘spins.’ Each spin will point in different directions, and their magnetic fields will cancel each other out. There is no order. If the temperature goes up, the more random. But when the temperature decreases, the spins will spontaneously align themselves, so that they all point in the same direction. Instead of cancelling each other, the different magnetic fields now add up, producing a strong overall field. 

 

But here’s the clincher, with spontaneous self-organisation there has to be disorder first for new random fluctuations to emerge. A dynamic state between order and chaos emerges otherwise called “The Edge of Chaos?” Only when chaos builds to a large point can a weak fluctuation be amplified to create a new pattern. 

 

If we are made of cells in animation, experiencing ‘life” then surely we must be a ‘life force.” 

JAX Tyres for Ponderings

When we endeavour can we align spontaneously with each other? What about consciousness? Is this a shared resonance? I don’ t know about you, but there’s a whole lot of chaos on planet earth right now. 

Is this life simulation or an echo bouncing back at us? 

Is it not the stars that shine brightly or us reflecting from them? 

Is this spontaneous self-organisation a science theory about to be proven, or is there a frequency of divinity that is not an external force understood of old but one mighty universe from within? 

Wouldn’t it be a cosmic kind of sonic bang if we aligned and were no longer controlled by genetically modified consumerism and started a new pattern?

 

Fish swim, fireflies light. What if human’s ‘kinded?’ If every single action is with kindness, then maybe with a little quantum physics, spin and a dash of positive loop feedback, we can evolve and change some of those class ideas while we are at it. 

 

We are like litmus paper; if we are slowed will we finally be ready to absorb the wisdom that comes in waves from our ancestors? Do we know how? 

 

One can only ponder. 

 

 

 

References for further reading;

http://assets.press.princeton.edu/chapters/s7104.pdf

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ypBqxv_tz8

 

http://www.freshvista.com/2014/natures-self-organizing-patterns/

 

https://systemsinnovation.io/self-organization-overview-articles/ 

https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-019-46104-z

 

(http://134.184.131.111/SELFOREX.html)  

 

 

Written by Kirsten Macdonald

Narnia, A Faraway Tree with a smidge of a Doc called Suess, and some Kahlil Gibran is the word charm that grew seeds in Kirsten Macdonald's imagination. She has an innate curiosity about the stories of "us" and a deep faith that is strongly supported by a dark sense of humour. Ask this wordsmith about anthropology, ancient religions, the curious nature of humanity and the incredible cuteness of sloths and you will have a conversation for hours. Writer, editor and researcher, Kirsten has developed Ponderings into a space that is now shared by a team and a shared vision that is infectiously positive and forged in good stuff.

Related Articles

Related

Follow Us

Join

Subscribe For Updates & Offers

Support our mission to write and produce Positive Stortelling, it takes a tribe to build one. 

Shapeshifters, Hairy Dancers and Things That Go Bump in The Night

Shapeshifters, Hairy Dancers and Things That Go Bump in The Night

The Myths, The Magical and Mysterious

 

words by Kirsten Macdonald 

 

Our modern-day screens are overwhelmed with creepy blood-curdling monsters.  

 

These frequently overtly sexualised characters who morph into werewolves and vampires, sirens singing sailors to their deaths or the deep blue seas. Supernaturally charged, they have evolved from the village fireside precautionary tales and spins of old to the pop culture halls of fame. 

 

Have you read the original Grimm brothers Fairy tales? I studied them at University at they are not for the faint of heart. Don’t even get me started on Little Red riding hood, because that story isn’t what you think it is…

 

But what about the monsters lurking around the world who haven’t had much love? Let’s give these ghastly Villians some attention! Mind you, after you are well informed, you may understand why they are not so popular, they’re not the kind you want to bring home to Mum. 

 

The Näkki

 

In Finnish mythology, a Näkki (Estonian: Näkk) is a Neck. This shape-shifting water spirit usually appears in human form, residing in darkened pools, wells, docks, piers and under bridges.

 

Notorious for yanking young children down into the depths, it is advised for our young ones not to look into the water or lean into the depths. 

 

Nordic mythology tells us Midsummer’s night is when Näkki rises from the water to dance with people celebrating. BEAutiful to look at from the front, their back is bewhiskered and uncomely. 

 

Näkki is also called Vetehinen or Vesihiisi (water fey, see Hiisi).

 

Ponderings PHoto monsters NAakti

Nunyunuwi The Stone Man

 

Known to the Cherokee nation; the Stone Man or Nunyunuwi is a shuddersome character. 

A wicked cannibal, this flesh-eater prefers hunters for meals and takes on the disguise of an old man wearing a stone coat. Stories tell of his defeat and rising. There are many variations, but in all, he is dyspathetic when it comes to menstruating women. At that ‘time of the month, women became powerful allies in warding off the Stone monster and his enormous hunger for human flesh. 

 

Cuca   

 

From Brazilian folklore, Cuca is a diabolical female monster. She is a hideous witch, with some age, and who has an alligator head. Cuca kidnaps the naughty children who won’t go to sleep. She is a curmudgeonly and hellish hag that will commit evil deeds to those who don’t snooze: terrifying little ones everywhere and a fearsome ally to parents all over Brazil. Close your eyes, children! 

 

Although Cuca came from the Portuguese coca, in Tupi (an indigenous language of Brazil), Cuca means to swallow something with a single gulp.

Yikes. 

 

photo credit Real World Fatos

photo credit Real World Fatos

JAX Tyres for Ponderings

Grýla 

 

Iceland has its own Ogre, and it isn’t a green loveable Dreamworks character.   Grýla is a terrorizing giantess who dwells in the mountains of Iceland. She wears a prickly and hairy chin, has eyes in the back of her head and has a pet Christmas cat, a fearsome creature who eats people who don’t get clothes for Christmas. 

 

Again a tale told to frighten children (poor kids, really parents!) Gryla is known for her keen hearing, and she can smell a child from miles away. She too has a hankering for human flesh, particularly that of wicked children. She stores them away for a Christmas stew. She was so awful that in 1746 public decree prohibited parents from traumatising their kids with the tale any longer. Thank the heavens. This one is dreadful. 

 

Picture: Brian Pilkington from the book The Yule Lads

Picture: Brian Pilkington from the book The Yule Lads

Draugen

Draugen is the sinister ghost of a man who died at sea terrifying Norweigiens. He is behemothic, coated in seaweed, and rows in half a boat. DRaugen’s trademark is an ear-piercing scream to announce his arrival, and he likes drowning sailors and those who want to fish. 

 

Weapons do not defeat him, only a warrior can wrestle him back to his gruesome cave, and this fiendish ghoul can enter the dreams of the living along with shapeshifting and future telling. According to the Function of the Living Dead in Medieval Norse and Celtic Literature, the mottled man is intelligent to boot; this Old Norse monster was undoubtedly worth a mention. 

listversepicturecredit

photo credit listverse pictures

The Capitalismus

 

Finally we have the last one- the nastiest of them all- The Capitalismus. 

A fire breathing monstrous beast, this one devours Brazillian rainforests with licks of fire, riding large mechanical beasts and filling it’s belly with the fear of the people. A terrifying traveller, this fiend travels the globe seeking victims. Often seen as attractive and seductive, the Capitalismus cloaks itself in badges of honour and munches on sea dwellers, driving them out of their homes and lands. Particularly shifty, this insidious trickster is very troll like and keeps dungeons of gold and silver tucked away. Not for the faint, this monster can only be defeated by the bravery of those who believe in equality and protecting the tribes with truth and honour. 

 

You can read more about them here: https://www.britannica.com/topic/capitalism 

 

credit photo Alexas Fotos Ponderings monsters

photo credit  Alexas Fotos

 

References and important notes for our Ponderers

 

The Cherokee Nation is a sovereign tribal government. Upon settling in Indian Territory (present-day Oklahoma) after the Indian Removal Act, the Cherokee people established a new government in what is now the city of Tahlequah, Oklahoma. A constitution was adopted on September 6, 1839, 68 years before Oklahoma’s statehood. 

https://www.cherokee.org

 

The Sami are the indigenous peoples of the northern part of the Scandinavian Peninsula and much of the Kola Peninsula, and live in Sweden, Norway, Finland and Russia. It is estimated that they represent between 50,000 and 100,000.

 

https://www.iwgia.org/en/sapmi.html

 

The Unknown Lore of Amexem’s Indigenous People: An Aboriginal Treatise

 

https://www.firstpeople.us/FP-Html-Legends/NunyunuwiTheStoneMan-Cherokee.html

 

http://nativeamericanantiquity.blogspot.com/2013/05/cherokee-witchcraft-conquering-stone.html

 

https://blogs.transparent.com/portuguese/the-legend-of-the-cuca/

 

https://guidetoiceland.is/connect-with-locals/regina/gryla-and-leppaludi-the-parents-of-the-icelandic-yule-lads

 

http://wayback.vefsafn.is/wayback/20130122160640/http://icelandreview.com/icelandreview/search/news/Default.asp?ew_0_a_id=317411

 

http://www.thjodminjasafn.is/jol/adrar-vaettir/nr/2983

 

https://izi.travel/en/b530-creatures-of-norwegian-mythology/en

 

The function of the living dead in medieval Norse and Celtic literature: death and desire. Lewiston, New York: Edwin Mellen Press. 

 

Nordisk familjebok Linköping University

 

Old Norse: Draugr, plural draugar; modern Icelandic: draugur, Faroese: dreygur and Danish, Swedish, and Norwegian: draug) is an undead creature from Norse mythology, also called aptrganga or aptrgangr, literally “again-walker” (Icelandic: afturganga).

 

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/history/2020/04/in-brazil-indigenous-people-fighting-to-keep-children/

 

https://www.hs.fi/english/article/Uncovering+the+secrets+of+the+Sámi/1135218761063/

 

Written by Kirsten Macdonald

Narnia, A Faraway Tree with a smidge of a Doc called Suess, and some Kahlil Gibran is the word charm that grew seeds in Kirsten Macdonald's imagination. She has an innate curiosity about the stories of "us" and a deep faith that is strongly supported by a dark sense of humour. Ask this wordsmith about anthropology, ancient religions, the curious nature of humanity and the incredible cuteness of sloths and you will have a conversation for hours. Writer, editor and researcher, Kirsten has developed Ponderings into a space that is now shared by a team and a shared vision that is infectiously positive and forged in good stuff.

Related Articles

Related

Follow Us

Join

Subscribe For Updates & Offers

Support our mission to write and produce Positive Stortelling, it takes a tribe to build one. 

%d bloggers like this: